Navigating Loss: Therapeutic Insights for Healing and Growth

Photograph by Nana Ampomah

Loss touches every life in profound ways. It could be the loss of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or a significant life transition. Working through these challenges is a profoundly personal journey. In my practice, I see the importance of finding ways to navigate loss that fit the person, not a formula. Here, I offer a perspective on living with loss through therapeutic approaches that encourage self-compassion, connection and honest support. One note on scope: most of the research and services mentioned below concern bereavement after a death; other losses are real and painful, but the evidence should not be assumed to transfer automatically to every kind of loss.

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Grief is the emotional response to loss, and it can affect us physically, mentally and emotionally. It does not unfold through a fixed sequence. People may experience sadness, anger, guilt, numbness, relief, yearning or many other responses, and these feelings can recur or coexist. Swiss-American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross developed her well-known stages primarily from observations of terminally ill patients; her book also discussed patients’ families and anticipatory grief. The stages were not developed or validated as a fixed universal roadmap for bereavement after a death (Kübler-Ross, 1969; Stroebe et al., 2017). What helps is not fitting your feelings to a model, but having them recognised without judgement.

Many clients find it challenging to treat themselves with kindness when grieving, often blaming themselves or struggling with self-criticism. Self-compassion, described by psychologist Kristin Neff, involves treating ourselves with the same care we would offer a friend (Neff, 2003). Neff’s paper is a conceptual account rather than bereavement outcome research, so I offer self-compassion as a potentially helpful practice rather than an established treatment effect. In sessions, I encourage clients to explore practices that remind them they are not alone in their feelings or experiences.

Loss can feel isolating, and many people value support from trusted others, whether family, friends or community groups. Safe spaces to express grief can make it easier not to bottle up emotions. In therapy, I work with clients to identify supportive relationships and develop ways of sharing their experience openly with others, where and when they choose to.

For some, understanding loss is part of making peace with it. Viktor Frankl’s logotherapy emphasises finding purpose even in painful experiences (Frankl, 1984). That is a theoretical and experiential account rather than controlled evidence. Some people find meaning-making helpful; others do not want or need to find a lesson in loss, and therapy should not pressure anyone to make grief meaningful. Where meaning does emerge, it belongs to the person, not the therapist.

Personal rituals, memories and an ongoing inner connection with the person who died can be meaningful for some people, but their effects vary. A memory box or a special anniversary is one way some clients choose to honour what mattered. There is no correct way to remember. The focus should be on what is personally, culturally and spiritually helpful to the bereaved person.

Loss often demands practical adjustment as well as emotional processing. Lazarus and Folkman’s (1984) distinction between problem-focused and emotion-focused coping is a useful theoretical lens: practical changes on one hand, ways of managing emotional responses on the other. In therapy these are explored as options to try, not guaranteed routes to resilience.

Grief is highly individual, and most grief reactions are not mental disorders. Many people gradually adapt with time and support. Prolonged grief disorder is recognised when specific diagnostic criteria are met, and depression or PTSD can also occur alongside bereavement; only an appropriately qualified professional should assess this. Specialist help may be useful when grief remains intense and persistent or seriously disrupts daily life. If you are struggling to cope, speak to your GP or contact a bereavement service such as Cruse. If there is an immediate risk of harm, use urgent NHS or emergency support.

Loss asks for patience, self-compassion and support. My role as a therapist is to accompany people through it, offering space for reflection and ways of coping that fit their life. There is no obligation to grow from grief or to transform: adapting, living with the loss and staying connected to what mattered are enough, and pain and connection can coexist.

If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E. If you need urgent mental-health help in England, use NHS 111 online or call 111 and select the mental-health option. Samaritans can be reached free on 116 123.

References

Frankl, V. E. (1984). Man’s search for meaning (Rev. ed.). Washington Square Press.

Kübler-Ross, E. (1969). On death and dying. Macmillan.

Lazarus, R. S., & Folkman, S. (1984). Stress, appraisal, and coping. Springer.

Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85-101. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309032

Stroebe, M., Schut, H., & Boerner, K. (2017). Cautioning health-care professionals: Bereaved persons are misguided through the stages of grief. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 74(4), 455-473. https://doi.org/10.1177/0030222817691870

NHS. Grief after bereavement or loss. https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/feelings-symptoms-behaviours/feelings-and-symptoms/grief-bereavement-loss/

Cruse Bereavement Support. Understanding grief. https://www.cruse.org.uk/understanding-grief/

Evidence last reviewed 22/08/2026. This article is for general information and does not provide a diagnosis or replace individual medical, psychological or legal advice. Therapy outcomes vary, and an approach that helps one person may not suit another. If you have new, severe or persistent physical or mental-health symptoms, speak to an appropriately qualified health professional.